the year in review

Unhappily ever aftermath in the Phoenix. Barry Crimmins reviews 2002 -- "the middle of a fairy tale"

About Enron and Senator Gottagetmyfacetimeinevenifisoundlikethemoroniam:
"The best thing Enron did for its beloved GOP was spread money around on both sides of the ever-narrowing American political aisle. Connecticut senator Joe Lieberman's former chief of staff was a lobbyist for Enron. Lieberman also received campaign and PAC contributions from the corporation that he later gently poked and prodded at some Capitol Hill hearings.

"Responding to calls for him to recuse himself from the Enron investigation, the indignant Lieberman sputtered, 'To say Enron owns me is absurd. Anyone who knows me knows that I am first, last, and always a pawn of the insurance industry!'" Ah yes.

Earth Day:
"Bush went to New Yorks Adirondack Mountains on Earth Day. During the week preceding his visit, the area experienced a heat wave, torrential rains, an earthquake, and finally, while he was there, a blinding snowstorm, making him the first president so environmentally unfriendly that an entire mountain range refused to appear in a photo-op with him. The Adirondack Chamber of Commerce asked W. to keep his stay short because it feared that if he hung around and kept lying about the environment, the Bowels of Hell would open."

"Court-appointed president Bush underwent a colonoscopy, in late June, during which doctors successfully located his head, but only after performing an emergency procedure to remove the entire Fox News Network."

Iraq & N Korea:
"The difference between IraqҒs alleged desire to possess weapons of mass destruction and North Koreas admission that it is well on the way to having them is simple: should something go wrong with IraqҒs weapons, it could damage oil fields, whereas North Koreas weapons most likely would harm only Asians."

The Democrats -- whatever that is:
"A lot of people say the Democrats didnҒt have a message this fall, but they did, and here it is: we support the same things as the Republicans, it just takes us longer. We are bought by the same concerns as Republicans, just for less money. We are as silent about issues that matter to working families as Republicans, its just that our silence represents betrayal of our purported core values whereas Republicans are merely being consistent."

About Senator Ineverletmyreligiousbeliefsinfluencemyjob-psyche again:
"To close out the political year, Al Gore announced he would not seek re-election in 2004 and made a very gracious bow from the presidential arena. If only his old running mate Joe Lieberman would also do the right thing and challenge Bush for the Republican nomination, we might have a chance at having a semi-progressive Dem on the ballot in 2004."

Read the whole thing -- made Stanley (who sent it to me) laugh out loud many times.
Posted by .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) on 12/28/02 at 05:43 AM
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